attempts a normalcy...possible?

I've been making several attempts at creating a normal life lately. The new roommate, porn star Kylee Kross (she's a hottie, you can see her on burningangel.com), is a really good fit into our little family. On nights off, me, Nicole, Kylee and my boyfriend Zac have family movie nights. We've got the animals, who are like our children and so, in essence, everything should be great and comfortable and lovely. However, I've been experiencing an exorbitant amount of anxiety, especially when I think about leaving the house. I want to go out other than to go to work, but every time I do, it provokes anxiety in me and I'll make excuses not to leave. On the other hand, I feel that part of my problem is that I need to start going out and actually having fun. I do have the girls that I live with, who are great, and Zac who is wonderful and supportive but often times I feel an overwhelming sense of being very alone in this world. My thoughts can be so distorted some times. In addition to the anxiety and stomachaches, I have a hard time just doing normal every day things, including relating to the people around me. I'm wondering if there is something simple I can do to stop all of the constant feelings that something bad is going to happen. I've also been thinking a lot about my first six months of dancing. I was recently contacted by an NYU journalism student doing a paper on how blogging affects stereotypes. It really got me thinking about the fact that it took a total break down of my personality to do the job that I am doing. I would say I have a thicker skin now. However, sometimes I feel that I am seriously on guard when talking to people even outside the club and disconnected from myself and other people. I want to desperately to have real, honest fun as opposed to the manufactured bubbliness that I present at work. Any advice from other sex workers on how to decompress?